


Recollection (Sequel to Measure)

by KrystalKane



Series: Measure (General Hux Series) [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Anal Play, Anal Sex, Armitage Hux Being An Asshole, Armitage Hux Needs A Hug, Ben Solo | Kylo Ren - Freeform, Cunnilingus, Dominant Armitage Hux, Eventual Fluff, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, F/M, Face-Fucking, Fingerfucking, Fluff and Smut, Hand & Finger Kink, Hux (Star Wars) - Freeform, Hux (Star Wars)/Reader - Freeform, Hux (Star Wars)/You - Freeform, Kylo Ren - Freeform, Masturbation, Mirrors, Original Characters - Freeform, Original Female Character(s) - Freeform, Original Male Character(s) - Freeform, POV Second Person, Phasma (Star Wars) - Freeform, Romance, Rough Sex, Sexy, Shameless Smut, Slow Burn, Smut, Smutty, Vaginal Sex, dash of romance, dirty smut plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-17
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2020-12-21 00:04:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 20,843
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21065441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KrystalKane/pseuds/KrystalKane
Summary: We pick up where we left off in Measure. The General will stop at nothing to find you. When he does there is a twist, he must be delicate in rectifying the mess Kylo Ren has caused.The sequel to Measure! Our story continues where we left off. Thank you all for hanging on through my rough times and thank you new readers!





	1. Anywhere

**Author's Note:**

> Our first chapter starts off with The Generals point of view...

I can’t find her.

Anywhere.

She never arrived to her destination. I’ve already been there and back time and time again. I suspect my brother is either dead or living the high life with his bargained price from Ren. Part of me had hoped he wouldn’t have sold her, but I know him all too well. Better off dead, I’ll kill him myself if I find he’s taken a cut. 

Millions of credits have gone towards finding her and yet I’ve got nothing, in fact I have less than before. He made her disappear completely, erased her from all files and any record of her. He even managed to erase records of her family. His mind bending capabilities erased her from the minds of anyone that interacted with her. This is the only clue I have to believe she’s still alive, the sheer effort he went through to erase her. 

Or part of me to believe she’s been left alive. Ren taunts me daily over it, it’s merely a game. I’ve considered killing him, but he’s the only one who would know of where she is. I need him.

…it’s been three-hundred days since I last saw her, tomorrow will be three-hundred and one.


	2. Prattle

The next morning the General woke to a hub of quiet gossip. Normally this was something the General wrote off as nonsense. All day he heard the murmurs of the news about some sort of celebrity that’s been missing for some years and now found in hiding? The story wasn’t very clear coming from multiple workers quit mouths. It was prattle. Garbage. Every employee talked with pure fascination of this dribble.

With a migraine fully set in the General was at his wits end with his uncooperative slacking staff. Mitaka was carelessly surfing gossip laden articles on his work touchpad in full view of the General. 

“Lieutenant!” The General called from behind with a shrill voice. The timid man turned to face the red head, he outstretched his hand for his touchpad. Mitaka surrendered it without a word. By now everyone else in the room was staring, turned away from the work screens and maps in the main flight hall.

“Touchpads are a privilege in the First Order. I thought I was generous by letting you take these to your personal quarters after work hours given that you do not play on them DURING WORK.” The General bellowed out to the room making an example of the reddening Mitaka.

“Reading tabloids, playing games, and general amusement on these devices at work will result in confiscation. You are not children. Do your jobs. Get back to work.” He went on. He shook his head with Mitaka’s touchpad in hand, he glanced down at what seemed to be more important than work for everyone today.

The General’s heart lumped in his throat. It was a picture of a woman.

It.  
Was.  
Her.

The General quickly strode out of the main flight hall frantically thumbing through the article.

_“After what was a decade’s long search for lost heir to the dominion of planet Vinditus, the search has finally come to an end. Once thought dead but now found alive with severe amnesia, princess Astralle was found in the early evening on the neighboring planet Aiphus. The royal family wishes to be left alone in their new fortunate time with their lost daughter. They however announced that there will be a coronation ball welcoming her home in the coming weeks as she is being rehabilitated with some of the finest doctors in this galaxy at her side. It is rumored her founder was none other than Kylo Ren, although it is still speculation at this point, the family expressed her savior will be paid handsomely.”_

The General walked abruptly into a group of Troopers taking to the hall. He glanced up without apology and stepped through them.

“REN!” The General cursed the mans name through the halls. He was quick to make it to the tyrants personal quarters, before he could even beat his hands on the metal door it opened swiftly. The towering man in black stood there behind his mask, he had been waiting.

“You fuck!” The red head quickly pulled his blaster from his belt and pointed it at the mans mask.

“General, what has you upset?” The masked man daunted.

“I know what you did with her, I know about Vinditus!”

“Isn’t that great? Such a happy story, sort of coincidental that the missing princess looks a lot like the little bitch you kept around your quarters.”

“I should kill you.”

“Maybe, but Supreme Leader is VERY interested in a new arms deal with planet Vinditus. Not to mention it’s mining attributes. You don’t want to make a mess of that do you General? The king basically told me he would give me whatever I wanted for finding his precious flower. This is an opportunity, your little bitch finally has a purpose. Good thing I found another use for her, she’d be dead otherwise.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the first two chapters are short, but they will be much longer on the road ahead!


	3. Pleased

Everything was all so…odd. This bed. This room. This palace.

Your life.

But you didn’t know any better now could you? You knew nothing. Not even your name. 

After a handful of weeks and some days in the company of strangers you struggled to remember the name given to you, your previous life was just on the tip of your tongue…on the tip of your mind. Waves of hopeful recognition came and went, would this be the moment you remember SOMETHING? So far the moments left you in confusion and frustration because you were so close to remembering SOMETHING. Maybe it was the constant overhanging migraine that deterred you.

They call you Astrelle, but it feels so wrong. But again, you don’t know any better. This entire thing is exhausting, right down to the feeling of complete discomfort. You couldn’t sleep, the anxiety was too heavy. A doctor is coming today to discuss this with you, or rather your parents. He’s also coming to check up on your weight because at your arrival whatever hellscape you had been in for the past…however many years...had done damage to your body. 

A jovial man sat close by your bedside to assure you everything was going to be fine, that you were strong. He was on the heavier side, bearded and rosey. His name is Quinten Voma. King of Vinditis, your father. He had a voice that carried across entire wings of the palace, usually it was laughter. Joyous would be the best word to describe him.

He sat in a white velvet chair with gaudy pink embellishments about an arm’s length away from you while you sat comfortably beneath the covers of your bed. You spent most days here in this bedroom, it was virtually untouched since you went missing so many years ago. It was still a little girls’ room, everything was either lined with pink, white, or gold. A corner harbored a monstrous pile of stuffed animals and dolls. The ceiling had to be at least thirty feet high and white painted metal doors stood as tall as several men. A pair of solid glass doors invited the sun on the white pearl bedspread of the king sized bed. On the other side of those doors was an oblong balcony overhanging a rocky cliff, and beyond that was the ocean. 

Most nights you slept with the glass doors open to hear the calming waters, they made the gnawing in your head go away. Last night was especially stressful, you witnessed your father get into it with the Queen. Your mother.   
Your mother, Nerva, wasn’t present in the room. In the weeks you’ve been here you’ve seen her less than a handful of times. She was at least a foot taller than your father, very slender and youthful looking aside from her stark white long hair. It could drag on the floor if it wasn’t pulled up in some sort of updo or braid. Extravagant gowns and robes were her personal favorite, everything she wore was the same color however, dark forest green. Last night she was intended to join you and your father for dinner, initially she was late and then it went downhill from there. She hardly ate and picked at her food, she hardly looked at you and didn’t say a single word. When she excused herself your father followed and they both proceeded to have it out in a nearby hallway, they whispered harshly but you knew…it was about you. While your father was overjoyed at your return home, she seemed uninterested and distant. Or maybe she doesn’t know how to handle it?

“Is my mother coming to the appointment?” You asked curiously, you were more curious about what she was up to more than anything else. You felt embarrassed to be hurt by a woman you didn’t technically know.

“No…” Your father sighed “But she says were having a special guest come to the palace today, I’m sure she’ll be present for that.”

She’ll come out for a guest but not comfort her daughter?

“Are you hungry at all Lady Astrelle? I’m brewing a bit of tea for afternoon treat.” A womanly figured droid entered your thoughts. She’s B3-13 but everyone calls her Betsey, she had overly polished chrome plating and glowing pink eyes, maybe to mark that she was a feminine droid? 

“No thank you.” Lunch was not long ago, you were still full. They fed you well here, the goal was to get you to gain weight after all. The doctor was worried about malnutrition as well, the vitamin regime was intense, and they all had a sickly smell to them. Betsey left the room briefly and returned with a chrome teapot and matching cups.

“You must be getting excited for your welcoming ball Lady Astrelle.” Betsey remarked pouring some tea.

You took the cup from her outstretched arm “I’m nervous.” You admitted.

“I’ll be there with you.” Your father added. 

“I wouldn’t worry, your gown is stunning. Lady Nerva did a remarkable job picking one out for you. It’ll be quite beautiful on you.”

A light buzzing sound interrupted the conversation, Betsey was quick to answer and let in the form standing on the other side. It was Doctor Djin with a light grin on his face. He was just as cheery as your father, in that respect they got along almost too well. The man gingerly walked in carrying a small medical bag and with an FX-6 medical droid in tow.

“Hello Lady Astrelle, how are we today?” He immediately asked upon entering, he nodded at your father.

“I’m ok.” You answered meekly.

“How’s your migraines?”

“I have one now.” 

“That’s not quite alright.” He sighed for your wellbeing, he set his bag at your bedside and knelt down in front of you. His cold hands grabbed for your face, he looked over your eyes and set another hand over your forehead. 

“I’ve ran out of the pain pills you gave me.” You told him.

“That’s my fault. I should have left you with more for these persistent migraines. Have they let up at all?”

“A little, ever since I’ve been taking those supplements.”

“That’s good news.” He finished looking over your eyes.

He called for his droid to assist him in weighing you, it had the ability to weigh you among many other features. All it took was a simple blood sample from your finger.

“Subject has gained approximately 3.7 pounds.” FX-6 announced.

“Now there’s some progress, this is good.” Doctor Djin wrote away on a touch pad.

Your father watched from the chair as your appointment went on, everything was going well. Gaining weight, absorbing the proper nutrients and such, the doctor even complimented your improving complexion. It didn’t go on too much longer as it was nearing the time to get ready for this special guest arriving within the next hour. The doctor excused himself into the hallway with your father, before he left he handed you a metal pill bottle. They were higher dosages of the migraine medicine he promised that he’d give you, you downed one immediately as Betsey tended to you.

“Come now Lady Astrelle, we must ready ourselves for our guest.”

You reluctantly dragged yourself from your bed and followed her into the bathroom connected to your bedroom. It was on the smaller side in your opinion, especially for a palace room. Every surface was pearl white and pristine, droids cleaned it practically every day. Sometimes twice a day. 

“Betsey, do you know who’s coming to the palace anyway?” You asked undressing yourself. 

“I’m not sure Lady Nerva would want me to spoil the surprise.”

“Well…it must be a big deal if I’m getting dolled up for this person. Tell me anyway?”

“Very well Lady Astrelle, all I can say is that he’s the man that found you on Aiphus. He’s coming to see if you’re well taken care of since he brought you home.”

You didn’t remember much of that man, much less that day. Everything was blurry and what you could remember was barely being able to keep your eyes open. He wore a lot of black and that he was tall. You sure didn’t remember a face, didn’t he wear a mask? His name completely escaped your mind like everything else. 

“What’s he like?” You asked. Betsey started to draw a bath.

“He’s…tall miss. Very tall.”

“That’s reassuring…” You half rolled your eyes dipping your feet into the tub.

Betsey scrubbed away at your skin with a soft loofah. She soothed away a bit of your migraine as she washed your hair. You could feel the dosage of your new medication kicking in, this might be the difference you were looking for. The pain in your temples wasn’t as severe as before. Once you were out of the bath she dried your hair and began to style it. You sat on your bed fiddling with your hands as she worked, the towel around your body was starting to dry. 

With her styling your hair the migraine faded completely, this was the first bliss you’ve had in days. You were a bit discouraged when she was finished, you quite like the semi scalp massage. She started with make up next, powdering your face first and applying liner and mascara. She blushed your cheeks and applied a dark maroon lipstick.

“Do you like it Lady Astrelle?” Betsey held up a pearl hand mirror.

She fashioned multiple long braids and pulled them into a larger braid. It was a style your mother wore most days, it must be Betsey’s specialty. A buzzing sound came from your bedroom door, before you or Betsey could react in strode your mother. She fashioned a plain dark green dress that had a train to drag on the floor, a white fur stole covered her shoulders. She was menacingly elegant as she strode to you from across the room.

“Betsey, why is my daughter not dressed?” The woman chastised.

“I’m sorry Lady Nerva, the time must have slipped.”

“Get out, leave us be.” She demanded.

You stared down at the floor watching Betsey’s legs and feet exit the room. 

“Astrelle, please stand.” The woman asked in a lighter tone, only slightly menacing. 

You did as she said and stood, a pea green garment laid over the top of the white and pink chair your father sat in earlier. Without so much as another word she brought it to you and strung you up in it in front of a tall mirror. The corset felt tight enough, but she made sure that it would be tighter. You let out small peeps here and there as she yanked back on the corset strings. You struggled to strike up any words with her so you reluctantly stayed quiet for the time being. The dress dropped just above the ankle and tuliped outward like a flower. It had white embellishments that fashioned leaves with gold flowers. With the amount of money your family had you knew it was real. 

“I’m happy to be home.” You spoke up.

“I am as well, I have my daughter back.” She brushed her hands down your shoulders from behind and started dusting off the rest of your dress. She peered at you with a bright smile over your shoulders in the mirror.

“Will we be spending more time together?” You asked earnestly.

“We will soon, once your ball is had the whole kingdom will have more time for you.”

You sighed lightly at your reflection.

“Now, we must go to the parlor room. Our guest is at the front gate waiting to be let in.” 

Your mother led the way down and about the winding wings of the castle. Some parts you hadn’t even see yet, the sheer size of the castle was incredibly intimidating. White marble and chrome lined the halls along with massive black marble pillars. You passed various droids, maids, and other servants along the halls. Some smiled at you, you smiled back. Others hid behind pillars and in doorways at the approach of the Queen. What seemed like an eternity later you arrived to a set of black metal doors. 

They opened upon approach and your mother entered first, you followed through. Your father was there standing with his hands behind his back. A handful of chrome anti-gravity chairs sat around in an oval, you were urged to sit. You chose one that faced away from the door deliberately. The room smelled strongly of cigarettes and cigars. Your knee bobbed up and down as your parents quietly conversed amongst themselves. 

Rather than a buzz or a bell at the door a loud knock came bearing down on the metal on the other side. 

“It seems our guest has arrived.” Nerva took your hands in hers and made you rise from the chair. You heard the door open just behind you, a tall black cladded man bowed to your father upon entering. Queen Nerva guided you towards the men.

The man was strikingly tall and aside from that the first thing you noticed was along scar down his face. It bore into his porcelain white skin and long nose. His hair was long and dark.

He was…familiar.

“Astrelle this is Supreme Leader Kylo Ren of the First Order.” Your father introduced.

The man reached for your hand and bowed to you on his knees at your feet. He lightly kissed the top of your wrist and released your hand, he looked up to you.

“I am pleased to meet you again Lady Astrelle.” His voice was deep and resonating.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys this chapter came super late BECAUSE I BROKE MY FINGER AT WORK. YUP. BROKE IT BY SLAMMING IT IN THE DISHWASHER DOOR. I feel special with my abilities to hurt myself accidentally on a daily basis. 
> 
> I cant type again now though. Hooray!


	4. Napping

“P-pleased to meet you Kylo.” You replied.

“Supreme Leader.” You mother corrected.

“Yes, Supreme Leader, my apologies.”

“No need to apologize your highness.” He soothed.

“Well, shall we sit then?” Your father announced.

Your mother urged you to sit back down in the chair nearest you. Ren obliged to the chair next to yours, your parents sat in the remaining chairs across the way. You sighed internally to prepare yourself for the coming conversation. Before anyone could speak Betsy entered the room offering herself in service for drink orders. Mother ordered a glass of wine, your father water, and Supreme Leader Ren a glass of scotch. You declined anything until your mother insisted you take a bit of tea. To appease her you agreed. Betsy promptly left the room leaving you to scavenge for yourself.

“Now, let’s talk business.” Your mother began.

“Oh Nerva, that can wait. Let us have a sip or two of our drinks first.” Your father replied.

“I agree, I’m curious as to how well Astrelle is adjusting.” Supreme Leader Ren turned to you in his seat.

You had to muster up the words to end the awkward silence in you “I’m…well. As well as I could be.” 

“Very well, you were nearly dead when he found you. You should be thanking him.” The Queen remarked at you.

“Yes, thank you Supreme Leader. I’m grateful to be alive.”

Your father glared at your mother from his chair, she pretended as if he weren’t even there. Betsy once again swooped in to disturb the awkward air. Everyone had a sip of their drinks, you just held the warmth of the cup in your hands.

“Drink your tea dear.” Your mother sipped at her wine.

For some reason you obeyed. You dared not defy her in front of this guest and drank your tea.

The Queen cleared her throat and began again “Now, back to business. Understand that we are eternally grateful you’ve returned our daughter to her rightful home. We are indebted to you Supreme Leader.”

“Thank you, your highness.” He replied.

She nodded once “There were times in the past the First Order has shown interest in purchasing our weapons.”

“Of course we offer other rewards.” Your father interjected.

“BUT one of our most valuable assets is our arms. It would be distasteful to not at least offer up our finest inventions for a special price.”

“I understand you wouldn’t be able to give up such assets completely free, you are running a business after all.” Supreme Leader Ren replied.

“Yes, though we have other things to offer.” The Queen looked your way, you felt your spine shrivel.

“You’ll have access to our latest models and technology.” The King added.

You stared off into the distance as they discussed the use of the weapons this planet excels at creating. Price, number of units, and types of weapons were fleshed out. Every so often your mother tried to include your opinions, you just nodded along. You had been here so little there was nothing for you to add, all you knew was that they were high quality and powerful, or so you were told. Your family employed nearly sixty percent of the planet with the manufacturing of weapons. Many of the locals worshipped your family for employing them, not just because you were royalty. 

Your eyes started to feel heavier as the negotiation went on. The King tried to keep you engaged but you just nodded here and there along with the talking, all you could think about was a delightful nap hopefully to come after this. 

“What say you Astrelle?” Supreme Leader Ren interrupted your thoughts.

“Hmm?” You clarified.

“That I escort you to your homecoming ball?” 

“Oh…” You looked to your mother, she nodded at you encouragingly “Yes, that would be alright.”

“Then it’s settled! We’ll announce the alliance at the ball.” The Queen jeered.

Everyone rose from their seats, you only did so to follow along. The Supreme Leader bowed to your parents.

“We’ll have a servant see you out.” Your father spoke up.

“If I may your highness, spend a few moments with your daughter?” The dark man nodded to you.

“I think that’d be delightful.” Your mother answered for you.

Without another word your parents escorted each other out of the room leaving you alone with the man. You stood there silently in front of him not knowing what to say. In all honesty he was somewhat handsome, his height added to that. Again all you could keep thinking was that he looked so familiar. More so than anyone else you’ve met over the weeks.

“Are they treating you well?” He broke the silence.

You nodded.

“They’re not here, you can be honest with me.”

You looked around you, for any sign of anyone else around that might possibly hear you.

“I don’t think my mother likes me very much.” You answered a little too honestly. You didn’t know why you were telling this man your thoughts.

“Well, it’s been years since she last saw you, barely a toddler. She’ll come around.”

“I hope so.”

He outstretched his hand to your chin lightly lifting it his way, he was gentle with his touch.

“I wouldn’t want you mistreated in any way princess. If you ever need anything, I’ll be there.”

“Th-thank you.” 

The Supreme Leader bowed before you and simply left the room. You stood there a bit speechless, you didn’t know how to handle his thoughtfulness over you. Betsey came walking into the room to collect the dirty cups you all drank from earlier.

“Hello Lady Astrelle.”

“Hi Betsey.” You returned.

“Do you require any services?” She asked as she gathered.  
“Would it be too much to ask to help me draw a bath?” You asked.

“Oh I can start that right away. I’ll see you in your master bathroom after I tend to this room.”

“Thank you.”

She came to your bathroom as promised shortly after to help with the bath, more importantly get you out of the corseted dress your mother put you in. While sitting in the hot water and bubbles you noticed your migraine had completely slipped away. The new drugs the doctor gave you must really be working. However, you still wanted that nap.

You didn’t even redress, you just hopped into bed completely naked and ready for maximum comfort. Betsey said she would refer everyone to stay away for a few hours unless it was urgent so you could nap, she’d be back to wake you so you wouldn’t sleep into the night. 

With your migraine gone and a restless evening from the night before on your shoulders it didn’t take very long to fall asleep.

Some hours later…

_Unfortunately your body needed to relieve itself. You groaned to yourself dragging your legs out of bed and to the bathroom. The business was quick and you skipped back to the sunny bliss that was your bed. You yawned and pulled the bedding up to your chin turning over on your side._

_“It’s about time you’ve gotten back. I’ve missed you.” A voice came at your back. You quickly turned over to see a man lying next to you beneath the sheets. _

_Aside from the fact that he was in your bed, the first thing that struck you was his red hair. You were bewildered and sat up pulling the sheets over your chest. _

_The sun strode across his face, his lashes were blonde making his brown eyes seem bigger. A pillow was tucked between his arm and head, his other arm rested on his side. All you could do was look at him, he was quite handsome. There was something so comforting about the way he looked at you. It felt like he could protect you from everything wrong in the universe. It was familiar. _

_He sat up as well, you froze in your place as he reached out with his free arm stroking your cheek with the back of his fingers. They came tracing along your jaw and to your lips. He mumbled something inaudible to you._

_“What?” You asked of him quietly._

_He mumbled again, his lips moved fluidly but a jumbled whisper came out. Before you could ask him to repeat himself again his face closed the gap between your faces, kissing you._

You shot up from your sheets in a blind sweat. Hair stuck to your face and lips as you tried to collect your breath.

“Are you alright Lady Astrelle? It seems you had a nightmare.” Betsey startled you from the end of your bed, she carried a tray.

“No, no nightmare.” 

“You were talking in your sleep a bit.”

“What did I say?” You asked quickly.

“You just said the word “General” over and over again.”

“…weird…Betsey?”

“Yes Lady Astrelle?”

“Are there any redheaded men in the palace?”

“Not to my knowledge. I can double check for you if you’d like, the palace has a database with the credentials and profiles of every servant that has served under your family.” She suggested.

“Yes, please.”

“May I prepare you dinner while I run the files?”

You looked to the double doors leading out to the balcony, the sun had been replaced by the moon. 

“No, thank you. I think I’ll just go back to sleep.”


	5. Maze

You awoke to an obnoxiously loud beeping sound, it was different from your usual alarm but you scurried across your bed to disable what you thought was the alarm at your bedside. 

“Good morning Lady Astrelle!” Betsey’s voice startled you from the end of your bed, you shot up from your covers to see the alarm was coming from her chest, her eyes flashed along with the tune.

“You scared me.” You half laughed.

“Oh I’m very sorry my Lady, but I had to wake you for a very important reason.”

“Oh?”

“Supreme Leader Kylo Ren requests your presence for a luncheon today.” 

“Oh? I thought he left just yesterday?”

“Well that was before the Queen suggested he stay a while longer since he’ll be attending the ball as a featured guest tomorrow.”

“I see…”

“Lunch then?”

“Yes, since he’d like to see me I guess.”

“I sense wavering in your voice, are you nervous?”

“No, I just don’t know why he’d like to see me is all.”

“Perhaps he is fond of you.”

That was a thought that never occurred to you. You knew he cared somewhat based on your private conversation yesterday. Maybe lunch with a pleasant person would be good, your father has been preparing for the ball most days this week so you’ve been missing out spending time with him. Most of the workers in the palace avoided you less they face the wrath of the Queen. It felt like she wanted you to be lonely most days.

“When is lunch today?” You asked.

“Eleven.”

You looked to the clock on the marble nightstand next to the bed. It was five minutes past ten. 

“It’s going to be quite warm today, shall I pick out a lighter gown?” Betsey asked.

“I’d like to pick today I think.” 

The Queen had your closet filled with gowns and trinkets within the first few days of you arriving at the palace. There was a gown for almost every day of the year, the sheer size of the closet would sicken most. It was larger than most of the homes the citizens lived in.

Betsey followed you along the rows of colors, everything was color coordinated and sorted by length. You wanted something lighter in fabric and color since Betsey insisted that you’d be having lunch in the sunny courtyard with the Supreme Leader. A strapless dress with a straight skirt down to the ankles stood out, it was a light blue with small white detailed flowers. 

Betsey gave you an up do fashion for your hair with looping coils sticking out of a large stacked bun. Since you were going to be out in the sun she did light makeup on your face so you wouldn’t sweat it off. By the end of it your cheeks were a rosy pink with matching lips and large lashes. You were guided to a new part of the palace you had never seen before, out a servants quarters was the quickest way to get to the courtyard. You passed halls of rooms with white linen bunks and communal quarters for everyone that worked in the palace. 

You were blinded by the site once you made it outside, the white marble of the patio and hedge walls were bleached out by the sun. You squinted your eyes to see as Betsey lead the way, though you had to admit the sun felt nice on your skin. Aside from standing on the balcony in your bedroom you hadn’t been outside since arriving here weeks ago. You turned on your heels against the slick marble to have a look at the palace behind you, it towered into misty clouds above. You could see your balcony hundreds of feet above with long linen curtains in the breeze. Down here you were a bit closer to the ocean, there was still a cliff just on the other side of the marble hedge to your left. It roared much louder from here and you could feel a bit of mist speckling on your skin. 

Droids worked all around trimming the foliage in various chrome pots and polishing the marble walkways. When you looked down on the courtyard from your balcony it looked so small from above, you knew there was an atrium or gazebo of some kind coming up made of gold and intertwining vines surrounded by a maze. From down here it blended in with the maze, it was hard to tell you arrived until you nearly bumped into Betsey whom stopped in front of you. You peeked behind her to see the Supreme Leader sitting beneath the covered atrium at a table having a discussion with a service droid.

“May I present Lady Astrelle.” Betsey announced.

The Supreme Leader stood from his seat and bowed along with the service droid. He wore the same outfit he did yesterday, all clad in black. You wondered if he was sweltering beneath it all.

“We will return with refreshments.” Betsey and the other droid announced in unison before teetering off away from the atrium. 

“May I?” The Supreme Leader reached out his gloved hand to you, you obliged as he helped you up the few steps on the stage to the atrium. He pulled out the chair across from his at the linen covered table, they hovered above the ground so it was easy for him to scoot you closer to the table. He then sat across from you.

“Did you sleep well?” He asked.

“I did, I hear you stayed in the palace last night?” You replied.

“I did, I thought I might as well since I’ll be at the ball tomorrow evening.”

“Do you have the time to miss such important work?”

“I’m always working, and when I’m not, others work for me. I have a handful of my generals among others doing business on the palace grounds for me as we speak.”

“ah I see…”

“You must be wondering why you’re having lunch with me today.”

“Yes actually.” You replied, it was like he was reading your thoughts.

“Well, like I said yesterday I want to make sure you’re well taken care of.” 

“Thank you.”

“You look quite beautiful today princess.” He complimented.

Your cheeks had a slight flush to them “Thank you.” You replied quietly.

Betsey and the other droid came with platters of food before the Supreme Leader could say anything else. Small finger foods like sandwiches and crackers lay on the chrome trays, you were given a plate with a bit of salad too. They also left a pitcher of lemonade behind. You both served your own plates, he removed his gloves and poured you a glass of lemonade.

“What is it that you actually do?” You asked.

He half laughed as he poured the glass “Most days it’s ordering subordinates around. I see battle from time to time.”

“Battle? That sounds a bit terrifying.”

“It can be.”

You both ate a few bites of the food and continued on with awkward small talk. You didn’t know what kind of questions to ask nor did you know anything about yourself to add to the conversation until he asked you something you hardly thought about.

“Do you remember the day I found you?” He prompted.

You thought for a moment and when nothing came to mind you thought harder. Nothing. You remembered nothing. You thought so hard you gripped your nails into your palms. He watched you silently struggle as tears came to your eyes.

“I didn’t mean to upset you.”

“No no, I just…can’t remember anything. I try to but I don’t remember. I don’t even have a memory of any feeling either.” Tears strode down your cheeks “All I have is what people tell me to do here, I don’t fit.”

“Would you like me to tell you about the day I found you?”

You nodded through your tears “I would like that, maybe I’ll remember something.”

So he began his tale. How he found you begging in the street on the verge of passing out from the lack of nutrition. Your body was bruised no doubt from fighting off others trying to survive.

“You grabbed my hand on the street, I saw it. Your past.”

“You saw memories?” You asked.

“I did. And to think of all the people to reach out to me that day on Aiphus I found you. A lost princess.”

“What else did you see?” You squeezed his hand, you hadn’t realized you were holding it during his story.

He leaned closer across the table cupping his other hand over yours “This might be something we can’t discuss all at once. I don’t want to bring too many ill feelings before your big night tomorrow.”

You agreed and nodded at him, he held your hands until you calmed yourself from shaking. The lunch continued on with lighter conversations. He talked about his favorite foods since you both happened to be eating, you didn’t really have one but you told him about how fantastic the chefs were in the palace. Your only world revolved within the palace walls, you admitted you’d like to get out more on days like today.

“Perhaps I could visit you more often, of course only if you’d like.”

“I’d like that.” 

“I’ll be sure to make time for you princess.”

You smiled a bit and he returned the gesture back at you.

“Unfortunately I do have to get to work now.”

“Oh.”

The man sat up from the table, you did too.

“Thank you for having lunch with me today.” He bowed.

“Thank you Supreme Leader.”

“You can call me Ren, princess.”

“Thank you Ren.” You corrected lightly.

“Until tomorrow evening.” He leaned across the way, you froze as he planted his lips on your cheek rather dangerously close to your own. 

Betsey came strolling up the way as Ren left.

“Would you like me to guide you back to your room Lady Astrelle?” She asked.

“No thank you, I think I’d like to go for a walk instead.” You looked towards the entrance of the maze just beyond the atrium.

“I hope you don’t mean in that maze, it’s quite the mind boggler.”

“I’ll be fine.” You replied.

You were not fine. You got lost after walking mindlessly for fifteen minutes into the mind boggling maze. You thought you were smart enough to remember where you had turned, turns out if you aren’t paying attention in the first place it’s very easy to get lost. It was so anger inducing that you did this to yourself all you were doing is running into dead ends making matters worse.

“Betsey?!” You called out to the eight foot tall hedges. There was no answer.

You walked further on meeting another dead end.

“Shit.” You gritted 

“Hello!” You called out louder.

A left and another dead end. You turned around and made several lefts, rights, and even more dead ends.

“CAN SOMEONE HELP!? I’M LOST!” You yelled. Surely someone would hear you.

It was time to climb. 

You hiked up the length of your dress tucking the folds in your undergarments to hold, you hardly cared if anyone saw. You wished someone actually would because it had been at least an hour since you got lost. Surprisingly the vines held up as you climbed and once at the top you could see half of the maze, yet you couldn’t turn to see behind you to see the other half, your body wouldn’t be able to while still holding on.

A branch beneath you cracked, you yelped out as your legs fell inwards into the hedge, you gripped harder to not be sucked into the branches.

“Let me help you!” A mans voice came from behind. You suddenly felt hands on your lower back, you were startled at the voice and touch “It’s okay I’ve got you.” The voice assured you, and an arm wrapped firmly around your waist, though you didn’t want to let go of the hedge.

You tried craning your head to get a look at this person, you couldn’t see a thing due to your dress and the fact that they were directly behind you.

“Let go, I’ve got you.” 

You squeezed your eyes closed and let go of the hedge, with ease you were brought to the ground. You opened your eyes as you were turned around and made to stand straight.

And there you met familiar brown eyes you had seen before. Just yesterday actually, you knew immediately where you had seen them. He had red hair and donned a gray uniform with black trimming and matching buttons. He was the spitting image of the man awaiting you in your dream.


	6. Sunburn

You stood there trying to take in the full image of the redhead. He was strikingly pleasant looking, his face was soft as he look back at you. You felt a cool breeze around your thighs and rear, you realized your dress was still tucked in your underwear from your attempt at climbing. After realizing this you quickly pulled down the skirt of the dress smoothing it down while clearing your throat.

“Thank you.” Your voice shook at the embarrassment.

“You’re welcome Princess.” He soothed.

“You know who I am?” 

“Of course. You’ve been quite newsworthy, I am just outside your palace after all.” He nodded up at the tall structure in the distance beyond the hedges. 

You tilted your head and looked around for anyone else that may be around, then you resumed taking in his looks. He wore a gray jacket with black trim, he only wore it on his shoulders, his arms didn’t sit in the sleeves. He looked quite good in his uniform, it was different from the other First Order officers trekking the grounds. They all wore black or red.

“Is something the matter?” He tilted his head.

“No no…just…have we met before?” You asked.

“Perhaps in a past life.” He replied, a slight smile.

“What’s your-“

“GENERAL!” A voice came around from a hedge startling you.

A nervous looking officer with dark hair came whipping around and up to the both of you. General? Isn’t that what you said in your sleep when you first saw the red head? That’s what Betsey claimed.

“Yes, Lieutenant?” The red head answered.

“The Supreme Leader requests your presence immediately.”

“Very well then. I’ll be along momentarily.”

The man nodded and trotted off down an unseen aisle. The red head then turned to you.

“I heard you calling out, are you lost?”

“…yes.” You replied bashfully.

“Well you were very close, one of the exits is just over here.” He tucked out an elbow towards you.

You hesitated then linked your arm around his. As you walked with him you tried to keep your chin up and your posture as straight as his. He wasn’t wrong about the exit being near, you were red in the face from embarrassment. You were disappointed the walk was so short with this man.

You wanted to know more about him.

“Ah General Hux, you’ve met the Princess I see.” A familiar voice chimed as you exited the maze.

You felt the man holding your arm tense slightly and hold you tighter.

“Good thing you were in that maze, everyone has been looking for her for the past hour.” Kylo Ren added.

“Yes.” The General replied flatly.

“It’s best I return her to her quarters now.” Kylo Ren motioned his hand towards you.

The man released you, you hobbled your way towards the Supreme Leader catching glances at the General behind you.

“Are you alright?” Kylo Ren asked soothingly taking your hands in his.

You nodded looking back to the red head.

“We’ll have our meeting in the grand hall once I’ve returned our Princess to her room.”

“Yes Supreme Leader.” The man replied.

Kylo Ren linked your arm with his and led you off and away from the courtyard. You walked a few feet then looked back to the red headed General, then you looked ahead. Then a few feet later you looked back again. And again. Both you and the Supreme Leader were quiet until you reached the service entrance of the palace.

“Are you excited for your ball?” He asked.

“A little, more nervous than anything. I don’t know how many people will be there, everyone around the palace make it seem like it’s a lot.”

“Well I’ll be there.” He reminded you.

“True.” You smiled.

Some minutes later you arrived to the doors of your bedroom. The large bay windows of the hall were the only source of light in the area.

“It looks like you’ve got a bit of sunburn.” Kylo Ren commented to you as you reached for the chrome handles of the doors.

“Hmmm?” You looked up to him.

His hand captured your chin and tilted your head to look over your cheeks and features. 

“That sun was blistering today.” He hummed. You heart just about came bursting through your ears. You just bore your eyes into his hazel ones, his scar accenting his long face.

You held still, you knew what he was doing and yet you welcomed it. His lips came flush against yours. They were pillowy and warm, you reached a free hand to the back of his neck deepening the kiss. He broke away from your lips with a low whisper.

“Until I see you again Princess.” He breathed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter -
> 
> Bon Iver & St. Vincent - Roslyn


	7. Opponent

Ren left you to yourself after letting yourself back into your room. You stood there with your back against the door glossing over what had just happened. He kissed you, you kissed him back. And even though you liked it, you could only think of one person. That red head.

“Are you alright Lady Astrelle?” Betsey echoed across the marble room, it was as if she appeared from nowhere.

“Yes…” You felt your cheeks, you couldn’t tell if they were warm from the sun or from your flushing blood.

“Would you like me to help you out of your dress?”

“Yes please, and could you find my datapad? I’d like to read during a bath.”

“Yes, Lady Astrelle.”

She brought the datapad to the bathroom where she helped you undress, you waited until she was gone before you began your research. For some reason you didn’t want her to know, it was just a feeling. When she left you were quick to search the name General Hux.

His red head popped up on the screen, just as you remembered from your dream and some minutes ago in the maze. He has been involved with a military life from birth it seemed from what you’ve read. The ill-fated Starkiller base was a creation of his own and hehas a remarkable intuition for weaponry. There was a lot to read but none of it was personal. 

“Lady Astrelle?”Betseys voice startled you, you nearly dropped the datapad in the bubbly water.

“Yes?” you sighed a little.

“Are you hungry? Dinner is nearly ready.”

“I’m very tired, I was planning on going to bed after this.” You half lied, you were concocting and idea in your head, you were restless.

“I insist you eat, you haven’t eaten since lunch several hours ago.”

“Very well, if you come back and I don’t answer the door it means I’ve fallen asleep, if I’m still awake I will eat, if not don’t come in please?” You asked politely. 

“Yes Lady Astrelle, I will fix you a plate quickly.” She turned to leave.

“Betsey?” you asked

“Yes?” 

“Do you have to call me Lady Astrelle?”

“I can call you whatever you please, I was just being formal for your mother, I assumed you’d like it the same.”

“How about a nick name?” You asked, you were tired of being called lady for the hundredth time in a matter of days.

“Oh yes, how about Elle?”

“Perfect.”

“I will return with a plate of food Elle.”

“Thank you.”

When she finally left you to yourself again you darted out of the bathroom and straight into the closet without so much as drying yourself. You went straight for the gargantuan closet to find something less extravagant to wear. The only thing you owned with pants were several pairs of pajamas, even those were extravagant. You dressed in a pair and headed off out of your room and to the servants quarters you had seen earlier that day. Surely they’d have something for you to wear.

The halls were empty, most workers in the palace were turning in for the night. All the more easy to skip around the palace. The servants quarters were quiet, many of them were asleep in their bunks but you saw the holy shrine of disguises, a wall of burlap cloaks they all wore when it got chilly. You grabbed one closest to the hallway entrance and slunk away outside into the darkened courtyard.

“I just need to clear my head.” You told yourself as you slipped it over your pajamas. It was long enough to cover your ridiculous shoes, you debated going back to the servants quarters for something comfier but decided against possibly being caught. A pair of short heels will have to do, all you owned were heels to go along with the gowns. 

The road up to the palace was paved with white granite slabs, you’d be noticed if you took that route. But on your days around the palace you figured out there was an entrance leading right into the city, it was about half an hour of a walk following a trail made by people wearing it down over the years. It was wide enough to bring supplies, that was the one you had to take.

Waves crashed at the cliffs below as you walked around to the trail to the left side of the palace, to the back and right was just the ocean down below. Two guards waited by a gate to the trail, one face you and one facing the other way to catch all travelers. As you approached you pulled the cloaks hood over your head.

They wore green metal painted armor and golden helmets with many spikes adorned on them, they had tazing spears in their gloved hands. 

“Business for leaving the grounds so late?” The one facing you asked.

“The…princess is ill and needs a topical medicine from the city, we’ve run out.” You lied.

He just stood there calculating in is head about what you have just said.

“Let them through, you don’t want to deal with the queen when she’s angry.” The other guard turned to face you.

“Very well, return quickly.” The guard in front of you sighed.

You nodded and stepped on through the gate. Your heart pounded in your chest as you walked, they didn’t recognize you? You guessed the fact that it was dark and you wore your hood that that was the reason you got away. 

Every thirty feet or so was a tall street lamp to light the way, it had an eerie green tinge to its color on the roadway. You guessed it was better than no light at all. It was a steep roadway, the slope made for a quick trip down the hill, that wouldn’t be the case on the way back up. At the bottom was a thin veiled wooded area, through the trees you could see brighter lights and could hear nothing but a commotion of voices and animals. You broke through the trees to see an archway made of white granite, it had green sconces of fire across the top in a row. And there through the arch was the cities people, you could see hundreds of them walking around like ants to booths and through doorways, people walking in and out of the archway too. It was very busy. You were delighted.

It was so easy to slip into the crowd like everyone else. You had yet to be around your people, it was something your mother the Queen claimed to be weary of, your father regularly came down here while your mother visited less than a handful of times over the years from what you were told. 

Humans and Twi’leks were the dominating races of this region along with some mild mannered Devaronians. Other alien races were peppered in. There were carts parked along the sides of the road between doorways, vendors selling things like jewelry, clothing, and food. The smell was wonderful. Above your head was strings of lights all entangled into a beautiful mess to light the way. Every building you passed was granite, something easy to find on this planet, among other things. You bumped shoulders with people along the way, they didn’t seem to mind. It was a packed place. 

And then you tripped over a crossing droid that seemed to come from nowhere. You plummeted to the ground over the knee height orange and white ball. 

“BB-8!” A woman’s voice called, she stood over you. She was slender with brown hair wrapped in three buns on the back of her head, she reached out a hand to you. You took it and she helped you up to your feet.

“I’m so sorry about my droid, he’s excitable in crowds.”

“Oh no it’s alright.” You looked at the droid staring up at the both of you.

“Tell her you’re sorry BB-8.” She chided the droid.

“Weep-Weep.” He chimed at you.

“Again, very sorry. I hope you have a nice evening.” 

“You too.” You replied.

You submerged yourself back into the crowd watching the woman briskly walk away. Soon you were distracted by the vendors again. As you walked you came upon people crowding around a Twi’lek and Devaronian dancing together, people were cheering them on. You watched for a few minutes then went on again.

People gambled in the street standing over carts exchanging money and jewels. Some people bartered blasters and weapons, you didn’t stare too long at the gamblers, lest you attract their unwanted attention. 

“Miss! Miss over here!” An old croaking voice called towards you.

You followed the choice to an old woman sitting behind a booth with various colored cloths draping around it. You pointed at yourself, she nodded.

“Come on over!” She called to you. A blue cloak covered her body and gray hair, several braids stuck out of the hood, they were so long they went below the counter of the booth. You slowly made your way over, she kept motioning her hand to get you to walk faster. 

“Sit…sit.” She insisted pointing to a metal crate in front of the booth, you slowly sat down.

“Would you like me to tell you your future?” She asked.

“I have no money.” You replied.

“My consultation is free for lost souls. I could feel your need from across the way.”

“…Okay…but I feel like you should be paid.”

“Helping you is pay enough. Give me your hands.”

You placed your hands on the counter, she flipped your palms open and held her hands over yours. She went very quiet and looked above to the sky. She started mumble incoherently to herself, your hands started to run very cold. The feeling was so odd but you couldn’t pull away, even though her hands only rested on top of yours it felt like she was gripping your wrists with all her might.

She suddenly stopped and looked at you with a blank expression.

“The man...he’s not what he seems.” She told you, her voice was so monotonous it sent chills down to your legs.

“Who?”

“The tall dark one. Tell him no.”

“No what?” 

“Tell him no.”

“NO WHAT?”

“Tell him NO.” Her voice deepened.

“Please let go of me.” 

“He failed you once, he will not fail you again.”

“Who?”

“The man that you love…he loves you in return.”

“What’s his name?!”

“A—A…A”

Her grip suddenly loosened, your hands pulled away so fiercely you jabbed your own elbows into your ribcage. The old woman’s expression turned softer, her tone was more pitched when she spoke to you.

“I hope you’ve found your answers.” She told you.

“T-thank you.” Your voice shook.

You didn’t know how to respond, you could only stand back up and slip away back into the crowd again. You acted as if nothing had happened, though you felt out of breath. It took you some time to settle yourself down, walking helped some and the people watching helped even more.

The street you had been walking on was so long, it seemed endless and the crowding started to lessen as you went on. Fewer carts and activities lined the walls, a doorway in the distance was crowded off to the side. Three black bars with a red X through them sat above the doorway. Curious, you walked over to the crowd to try to see over their heads, others soon formed around you to see the commotion too. It was so tightly packed the mound of bodies urged themselves inside along with you. Once inside you could see an octagonal shaped platform in the center of the room. It was rather dark apart from the few lights projected onto the platform where two men fought. A Green Twi’lek and a human went at it, they were bloody and bruised. People all around them cheered throwing coins at them, even jewels. 

The Twi’lek was far superior, he was beating some serious ass. The human eventually forfeited. Another Twi’lek hopped on the stage, a woman. She looked a lot like him.

“Can no one defeat my brother and I?”

The crowd cheered, some booed. 

“Now it’s my fight tonight, who will face me? Or do I have to draw an unwilling volunteer from the crowd again? Remember I killed the last two!” She laughed.

No one would speak up.

“So be it, better leave now if you don’t want to be beaten within an inch of your life.” 

You saw that as your cue to go, but no one else moved. They wouldn’t even part the way for you.

“You there! Trying to leave.” Her voice boomed, you got a sickly feeling in your stomach. You knew she was talking to you. The room was overly quiet, all eyes on you.

“Remove your hood!” she demanded. You weren’t about to give her the satisfaction but a random crowd goer did it for you.

Some people gasped, the Twi’lek just smiled.

“It seems our lost Princess has fancied herself a night out on the town.” She teased “Tell me Princess, can you fight?”

“She’s so skinny little sister.” The brother laughed.

“An easy win. Everyone, would you like me to beat the Queens little girl tonight? If she wins I’ll buy you all a drink!” Everyone in the crowded room laughed “And if I win I can at the very least say I kicked some privileged Princess ass!”

You tried to scamper away but someone grabbed hold of your cloak, the crowd pushed you towards the stage. The Twi’leks with the help of others dragged you up onto the platform, you kicked and screamed the whole time. They made you stand, your cloak torn away from your body revealing your ridiculous outfit. 

The Twi’lek woman readied herself for a fighting stance, you stood there closing into yourself. Full panic set into the depths of your soul.

“Aren’t you going to hit me Princess?”

“THAT IS ENOUGH!” A man boomed from the farthest edge of the stage. Everyone’s head turned, including yours.

Red hair.

The General.

He hoisted himself on the stage grabbing your cloak along the way, you shook as he wrapped you in it and pulled you close against his body. His appearance hadn’t changed since you last saw him earlier that day.

“You will not harm her.” He announced.

“Our Princess is cowardly everyone!”

“You will get your fight.” The General assured her.

The General looked to you “Get yourself off of this stage. Don’t go anywhere.” He walked you to the edge, you sat down and scooted off the platform. He handed you his gray jacket, you folded it in your arms.

He walked back to the center of the ring to face the Twi’lek, she let out a gleeful call.

“Gregor!” She called out. A large red body parted the sea of people. A Devaronian hopped up on the stage easily, both of the horns on his head with sharpened deadly points. He wore only pants, not even shoes.

“Kill him my love.” The Twi’lek landed a peck on the Devaronians lips.

He had to be at least three feet taller than The General, and he probably weighed three time as much as him in muscle alone.

“Don’t you think this is a bit unfair?” the General asked.

“How so?” She asked.

“For him.” The General nodded at the red giant.

The Twi’lek frowned and ordered Gregor to attack.

Three swipes in and the General dodged them all. The General flattened his hand and chopped Gregor in the front of his throat. Gregor grabbed his own neck for relief as the General palmed his hand into the giants nose in an upwards leap, breaking it. As Gregor fell to his knees the General kneed him right in the face smashing his nose again. The crowd ooed at the site of the beating making horrified faces. The red giant held his face crying in anguish. Then the General simply punched him in the back of the head successfully incapacitating his opponent.

Just when you thought it was over the male Twi’lek jumped up onto the platform with two daggers in hand. He charged at the General, the Red head grabbed to oncoming hand and wrenched it with his arm. A crack came from the Twi’leks fingers, he dropped his dagger and yelled out. He swiped at the Generals side with the other dagger slicing his stomach on the side. This obviously pissed the General off so he wretch that one out of his hand as well breaking all the Twi’leks fingers in the process. The General then kneed him in the face.

A loud yell came from the woman Twi’lek, she was up on the stage charging towards YOU with daggers in her hands.

The General picked up a dagger at his feet and threw one without so much as a second thought at the woman, it dug right into her shoulder and she fell off of the stage at your feet. You kicked her in the face before she could swipe at you. Knocking her out, possibly breaking her nose.

It was over before it began.

You gave the General his jacket, he placed it over your shoulders and strolled you out, everyone parted the way for you both.

“You attract a lot of trouble.” He said once you were out on the street again.

“You seem to conveniently be there whenever I’m in trouble.” You replied.

“Well for starters I saw you leave the palace by yourself, I couldn’t have you go off alone into the city at night.” 

“So you followed me?” you smiled as you walked.

“This city can be unforgiving, as you can tell from the scene you just witnessed back there.”

“Why? Why did they want to hurt me?”

“Violence is how they express themselves, they’re not angry with you. They’re angry with your mother.”

“…Well, thank you General.”

“Armitage.”

“What?”

“You may call me Armitage, my first name.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter, I legit thought this was the PERFECT SONG. Especially for the Fight.
> 
> Lightning Bolt - Jake Bugg  
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xCiQXsvPr1M


	8. Honor

Armitage? So familiar, so fitting. You didn’t think of it too much longer because you remember back to the fight.

“Oh Gods you’re bleeding.” You remembered the cut at his side.

“It’s nothing.” He looked it over, it was at least six inches long, blood was seeping through the fabric of his tunic. 

“Let me help.” You dragged him by his arm to an empty booth, you could tell he was trying to resist but eventually gave in. You made him sit on the empty vendor cart, you pulled down some hanging fabric above your heads. You tried to press the wound through his clothes but in his sitting position the cut wasn’t visible. You tried to think of a less embarrassing way to tell him to literally take his clothes off.

“I can’t dress it with you wearing that.” You told him.

“If you wanted me to remove my clothes all you had to do was say the words Princess.” He raised a brow. Your face flushed with blood.

“Are you trying to court me Armitage?” You blushed.

“That was too forward, I apologize. I should mind my words.” He replied.

He helped himself out of the top of his tunic and jacket laying it next to himself. His skin was porcelain speckled with red freckles, he was lean but muscular. His left side was a mad red seeping blood, you did your best to wipe it up. You dragged down more fabric from above ripping it into strips and tying it together. You wrapped it around his waist doing your best to cover the cut. He didn’t even flinch, he wasn’t ticklish whatsoever, though he watched you intently. As you finished a breeze through the street swept up your cloak giving you a bit of a chill. You pulled the cloak back over your shoulders.

“Here, this is warmer.” He slipped his jacket up and wrapped it around your frame before you could object. You slid your hands through the sleeves instinctively putting them in the pockets to warm your fingers.

You felt something in the right pocket and started to pull it out.

“What’s this?” You asked smiling as it unraveled in your hand. It was measuring tape.

“A memento…from someone I’ve lost.”

“Oh…I didn’t mean to-“

“No no, you remind me of her. Uncannily.”

You looked down at your hand shoving the tape back in the pocket.

“She used that tape for the measurements of that jacket.” He added.

“I’m sorry you lost her.”

Silence passed over the both of you until the General sat up from the cart.

“I should be getting you back to the palace, can’t have you missing your ball tomorrow.” Armitage said lightheartedly. 

“Oh yes, the ball.”

“You sound like you’re dreading it.”

“I haven’t even been at the palace a full month.”

“Well I can’t say much to that.”

“I’d rather not go but my mother wouldn’t allow it.”

“And your father?” He asked.

“He tells me he wants my happiness. I don’t know how to be, I don’t know who I am.”

You sighed to stop yourself from ranting.

“We should be getting back, you need a real bandage.” You told him.

Armitage recommended you pull the cloaks hood back over your head, you agreed it was a good idea. Wouldn’t want to attract attention in the way that you did earlier. No one questioned you or him as you parted through the crowds. Probably because you were walking with a First Order General. 

You talked very little with him in the streets but on the green lit trail you were a little more curios.

“Where are you from?” You walked beside him.

“Arkanis.”

Something clicked in your mind “I’ve been there!” You exclaimed.

“You have?” He raised a brow.

“At least I think I have, does it rain there often? Is it wooded?”

“It rains practically every day, it’s heavily forested.”

“I’ve been there, when you said it all I thought about was the first thing that popped into my mind. It just came to me.”

“Do you remember anything else?” He asked.

You sighed “No.”

You both walked some distance further. 

“What was it like growing up in Arkanis?” You broke the silence again.

“Most days I spent my time inside in military schooling, my father wasn’t the lenient type with children.”

“No siblings to play with?”

“I have a younger brother, we were close as children even though we were always apart. We have different fathers, so we had very different childhoods. He’s gone off and lived his life how he sees fit, I’ve been living the military life ever since I could remember.”

“What’s his name?”

“Aven.”

“Is he anything like you?”

“Only in looks. Otherwise we’re completely different people, he’s quite the larcenist.”

“That is pretty different.”

“It looks like we’ve arrived.” Armitage pointed out the guards up ahead.

They didn’t question the General walking through, and they remembered you from earlier in the night. As you approached the palace you found yourself not wanting to go back inside, you actually wanted to spend more time with him. Even more than Ren. Was it the dream? Or that he saved you from that fight and defended your honor?

“Will I see you tomorrow?” You asked.

“I will be at your ball if that’s what you’re asking.”

You both came around the side of the palace near the maze where you had met earlier in the day. You safely removed your hood underneath the green lit light above the rounded doorframe. 

“Thank you, for tonight.” You told him.

“You’re welcome Princess. Sleep well.” He told you softly.

Your cheeks flushed as he turned away and back out into the courtyard through the dark. Giddily you skipped back up to your room. The halls were eerily empty, not a single person was in sight. You thought you were home free until you opened your door.

“Elle! Where have you been?” Betsey loomed in the dark, the only thing illuminating the room were her eyes.

“O-out.” You blurted.

“Out where?”

“In the courtyard. I wanted some fresh air.” You walked past her, the lights came on fully illuminating your room.

“Well I would like to know before you leave your room, I wouldn’t want to cause a panic.”

“Did you tell anyone I was gone?” You asked quickly.

“I hadn’t had the time, I’ve only been searching for you for a handful of minutes.”

“Well I was just out in the courtyard so no need to worry.” You slouched off the cloak and tossed it on the made.

“What have you got on your pajama top there?” She pointed at your chest. You looked down to see that your breasts were wet. You grimaced and pulled your shirt down hardly caring about showing them to Betsey, she’s seen you naked many times, plus she’s only a droid.

A milk white liquid beaded at your nipples, they were sore at the touch.

“What the hell?” You raised a brow “Is that…milk?”

“I do believe you are right. It’s called lactation.”

“I know what it means!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song For This Chapter
> 
> Wicked Game - Daisy Gray


	9. Unraveling

Betsey insisted the Doctor be called immediately. You swore her to secrecy either out of embarrassment or something else entirely that you couldn’t put your finger on. A small inkling at the back of your mind told yourself to hide it from your parents. You then told her to leave and not come back until the morning, she was beginning to agitate you. 

_You sighed loudly throwing yourself upon your bed. After a minute or two of laying there like a slug you pulled the comforter over yourself entirely. Just when you were about to drift off you heard an odd sound coming from beyond the doors right out to your balcony. You slowed your breathing to hear, nothing could be heard but the sound of waves trenching themselves against the base of the cliff below. _

_And then you heard it again. Clearly._

_A crying baby. A sound so distinct it was recognizable anywhere. _

_It cried louder._

_You sat up from your bed to listen. A voice also rang from the balcony, as if to soothe the crying. You pulled the comforter around you and decided to investigate. It dragged along the floor behind you like a cape wrapped around your shoulders. Coming closer to the balcony a figure appeared, blurry at first, as if you were looking through water. _

_The baby cooed some as the voice continued on, it was a voice you had heard before._

_The figure grew clearer with each step and soon you were upon it. You stared at the back of a red haired man in the moonlight. He held a bundled blanked in his arms, coddling the cooing creature wrapped inside. He gently rocked it focusing only his attention on trying to calm down the cries._

_“I don’t think you look much like me at all. I only lay claim to your hair.” He smiled down at the bundle. You peered over his shoulder to see the face of a wide eyed newborn with fiery red hair. The man turned with the baby in his arms to share with you._

_“I’d say he looks more like you my dear.” Armitage’s face came into full view in the moonlight. You stood there looking to the child, then to him._

_“Like me?” You asked confused._

_“Well, it has been a while since you’ve seen him. Not since the day he was born.” Another voice came from behind you. You craned your neck quickly to see Ren towering behind you. You looked back to Armitage and the child. Nothing was there. Just an empty marble balcony._

_“Forget them.” Ren told you._

_“What?” You whispered turning back to him._

_“Forget. Them.” He whispered to you. _

You woke with a jolt in your bed, orange light filled your bedroom. The sun was rising. You had had a nightmare.

****  


* * *

“You have Galactorrhea.” Doctor Djin proclaimed. He was cheery as always, Betsey unfortunately told your mother what was going on last night so now you’re getting a doctor’s visit with her present. 

“Galactorrhea?” You repeated sitting on the edge of your bed. Doctor Djin stood with your mother, she was overly dressed as usual. In a gown too dowdy to wear to the ball, so surely she’d change. It was still too much, the stones sewed on the bodice half blinded you with every turn at the sun.

“Yes, it’s when you produce discharge from your breasts. Not to be confused with lactation or milk. You’re overproducing prolactin, a hormone that helps milk production. Even men have been known to get it.”

“Is it serious Doctor?” Your mother pressed.

“No, it clears up on it’s own. Nothing to worry about. In fact I can give her a prescription to calm it down.” He told her.

“Thank you Doctor.” She replied.

“That probably explains those migraines you’ve been having. That’s a possible symptom.” He directed at you.

“Oh? I guess that makes sense now.” You replied.

“Will she be able to attend the ball tonight doctor?” Your mother asked.

“Of course! Nothing to worry about whatsoever.”

“Good, it’s an important night for her.” Your mother gave you a sly smile.

The Doctor didn’t stick around much longer after that, he prescribed some type of hormone you couldn’t recall the name of for treatment. Just another treatment to heal what ails you. Good news was you’ve still been steadily gaining weight.

“Well!” Your mother clapped her hands together once the Doctor left the room “Let’s get you in your dress.”

“But the ball is hours away.” You replied raising your brow.

“Darling we have a cocktail party to attend beforehand, did you not listen the other day when we discussed this?”

She awaited your response, she wasn’t going to be getting one because you honestly couldn’t recall her saying anything about other events going on for the day.

“Well it’s alright darling, I know your memory has been foggy.”

At the snap of a finger a slew of people entered your room. They were servants you recognized throughout the palace. Two of the younger women dragged you into the bathroom with Betsey and your mother following close behind. They drew a bath and started scrubbing you down, it felt like they were rubbing your skin raw by the end of it. Your mother claimed they were exfoliating your skin, they used a sugar scrub, a salt scrub and some sort of salve that removed your body hair with ease. 

The tub looked gnarly with a greyish brown ring in it. You were surprised by how ‘dirty’ you were despite bathing every day. Your skin glowed however, especially after they doused you with moisturizer. Then they sat you in a chair in front of the mirror in your room with nothing but a towel wrapped around you. Two people started working with your wet hair while another took a small razor to your face. You were told it was meant to remove the peach fuzz and make your make up go on smoother.

Your mother walked around the commotion lightly ordering the servants around.

“Once her hair is dried I want it curled…”

“Yes Lady Nerva.” The two working on your hair replied in unison.

The one that took the razor to your face wiped your face with a moist towel and started to tweeze your brows.

“Astrelle.” Your mother called to you, you looked up from your hands in your lap giving her your attention.

“I need you to pay close attention to me, tonight is a very important night for all of us, especially you.” She went on.

You nodded. She knelt down next to you taking your hands in hers as the women worked.

“Ren is going to ask you a very important question at the cocktail party.”

“What?” You replied.

“Say yes.” 

“I don’t understand.”

“You’ll know when the time comes, say yes for your kingdom, for your people.”

You didn’t know how to respond, you were curious what this important question was but found yourself unwilling to ask.

“Tell me you’ll say yes. Promise.” She pressed.

You simply nodded.

“Say it.” She told you.

“I promise.” You replied to please her for the moment.

“Good girl.” She cupped your cheek and stood.

The makeup they donned on you was heavier than yesterdays. They gave you smoke black eyes and a mascara that rocked your eyelashes. You felt them every time you blinked. The lipstick was stark white and practically irremovable and your brows were sculpted with wax. Not to mention the foundation and concealer hid any and all discoloring in your skin, there wasn’t much after your strenuous exfoliating and razor shave to begin with. Your cheeks were so brightly pink they looked like paint.

You thought they’d adorn your neck with jewelry, instead they painted thin silver rings around your neck and collarbone. They did put earrings on you, they matched the lace of your gown.

Your hair took the longest of all, you about fell asleep in the chair because the way they played with it was so soothing. 

Now it was time for the gown. It was simply elegant, you hadn’t seen it before. The top had a band of intricate beaded metal gray lace across the chest, another band just under that was another texture of lace to calm down the commotion up top. Your shoulders were exposed as the lace sat above your breasts and below that was stark white tulle draping down the rest of your body, down your legs, and to the floor. Your sleeves were tulle as well and billowed down at your sides.

Braids formed at the back of your neck to form two smaller buns like horns, your bangs were curled into ringlets at the sides of your face. For once you felt you looked the part of royalty, but more charismatic than the royal standing next to you in the mirror. 

“Now, let’s go greet the company for the cocktail party.” Your mother beamed at you with her hands on your shoulders.

You didn’t know whose idea it was to have the cocktail party outside but you wanted to slap them across the face. It was sweltering outside with no clouds in sight. Your dress was quite light with fabric but you could still feel yourself melting in the sun. Pockets of people stood around linen covered tables all over the courtyard, in the distance you could see your father entertaining a group of people surrounding him with one of his stories. A linen covered stage sat at the center with two black marble chairs, one was bulky and tall at the back. The other was smaller and slender with white etchings. A throne in your parents honor. The people in the courtyard were already dressed for the ball. You saw a sea dressed in greys, whites, and charcoal colors. Your mother donned the only colors in the crowd, her usual green. 

A familiar face stood at a table all by himself drinking a glass of champagne. His scar stood out under the bleating sun. You made a beeline for the man breaking apart from your mother.

“Isn’t it a bit hot to be wearing black?” You approached Ren as he took a swig from his drink.

“Well a formal event has its formalities.” He smiled at you.

His outfit looked like a mix between a tunic and a suit, he also wore a black cape with a gold inner lining. Large gold clips clipped the cape to his shoulders.

“If it’s any consolation, you look handsome.”

“And you look quite beautiful.” He returned.

Your cheeks warmed.

“After our kiss I thought of you all evening, and this morning of course.” He went on.

“It was nice.” You looked down with a slight smile. Truth was, though you liked it you didn’t really think of him much last night. You had other things on your mind, you couldn’t blame yourself though, you looked up from your feet to see both your mother and father looking your way.

“I think my parents are watching us.” You commented.

“Everyone is watching.” Ren pointed out.

And they were, everyone stared. It was embarrassing, perhaps a little belittling. Luckily they couldn’t hear your discussion. 

“Shall we?” Ren tucked out an elbow towards you, you looped your arm through it. He then guided you away from the party and into the entrance of the maze. You walked quietly next to him for several minutes deep into the maze, the commotion of voices could no longer be heard through the bushes. You both came to a dead end where a marble bench sat. 

“Would you like to sit?” He asked. You nodded as he guided you to sit. The marble was comfortably cold in comparison to the rising temperature outside.

You thought he’d sit as well, instead he knelt down spreading your legs apart. Even on his knees he towered over you just sitting there looking doe eyed right at him. His hands embraced your face kissing you deeply. His lips much more aggressive and hungry than the previous day. You kissed him the same, curling your fingers in knots over his hair.

But as you went on, all you could think about was another man. That red head and your dream. All you could hear were the cries of the baby.

“Are you alright?” Ren’s lips stopped against yours.

“Yes, just—thinking about tonight.” You lied.

He helped you up from the bench “I think we should go back to the party. We’re expected.”

It took Ren no time to navigate himself out of the maze where a large crowd gathered at the foot of the stage where your parents thrones sat. They stood upon it talking towards the crowd. 

“And it’s with great pleasure I announce the return of our daughter!” Your father gestured towards you and Ren from across the way. 

Your eyes met with Armitage whom also stood on the stage at the very corner edge. Another member of the First Order Stood at the other corner as if they were acting as guards to protect the royal family. Even though it was sweltering out, Armitage wore that grey General’s jacket and a black hat. Ren guided you up the stage where your parents stood.

“We’d like to personally thank Supreme Leader Kylo Ren for bringing our beloved daughter home safe where she belongs.” Your mother praised the man standing beside you.

“And in return he’s asked for a simple request.” Your father added, Ren nodded at the king and dropped down on one knee at your feet. Your eyes widened as he took your left hand in his.

“May I have your hand in marriage?” He breathed.

Your heart just about jumped through your throat with a gasp. 

You looked down at the man on his knee, the entire courtyard had their eyes on you. It was a three hundred and sixty degree view all around.

Just there…in the corner stood the red head. His unwavering stare bore into you from across the stage.

Both your mother and your father stood behind Ren. Your mother was bursting at the seams and your father looked sickly paler than usual. Your mother nodded at you with glee urging you to answer.

You looked at Ren again, he was waiting patiently for your response.

You considered it.

He did save you from a life of hell on Aiphus. Dying in the street and returned home to your family. You fancied Ren in some form of romance, you enjoyed his company and softness towards you. Even his kissing. He was a person that was…all too familiar.

But marriage? You hardly knew him.

“I-I….” You looked around the courtyard.

“It’s a simple yes or no question.” Your mother said under her breath.

“Nerva.” Your father snapped at her quietly.

You looked at Armitage again, he was motionless. 

“Astrelle.” Ren called your attention back to him, he cupped his other hand over yours.

“Yes.” You breathed without a second thought. You didn’t know why, it just came out.

“She said yes!” Your mother proclaimed to the crowd, the courtyard erupted in clapping hands.

Ren stood with your hand still in his and gave you a loving kiss against your lips. Your face flushed as your gut wretched with butterflies and sickness. It was an odd feeling.

You glanced up to see red hair parting the crowd…leaving.

You wanted to call out to him, but every instinct you had told you not to. You wished it had kicked in just moments ago, to have the backbone to say no.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SONG FOR THIS CHAPTER
> 
> THE WORLD IS UNRAVELING - MILCK  
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fsusSkpQC6s
> 
> This song in particular goes with the very end of this chapter.


	10. Chapter 10

All you could find yourself doing was stare off into the abyss of the party. Empty platitudes were given to you as Ren kept your arm interlocked in his as you moseyed around the courtyard. Despite the heat you could feel nothing but a chill on your arms. You hoped to see The General walking around, maybe he just had to run off for something work related, or perhaps the restroom. You tried to will yourself to eat, you only took a single bite from multiple hors d’oeuvres and abandoned the remnants in potted plants. Nothing was appetizing, it all tasted a bit off.

At one point Ren caught on to what you were doing and laughed a bit to himself. 

“Do you not like it?” He smiled.

You looked up at him with some sort of cheese concoction in your hand. He took it from your palm and ate it, it had a bite taken out of it already from yourself.

“That’s vile.” He commented trying to swallow it. 

At one point you and Ren walked around to a refreshment table, you treated yourself to an alcoholic beverage. You finished it within minutes and hopped onto a second and third. About an hour later you were floating on your toes. Though you could still walk straight you were thankful for Ren being near, your head rested against his arm as he chatted with a chancellor of some planet whose name escaped you.

The sun started to fade, everyone started to congregate inside. You were downing another glass of champagne when your mother approached.

“May I borrow my daughter?” She beamed at Ren.

“Of course.”

“We’re just going to freshen up inside.” She assured him.

She dragged your wobbly ass away from him and through the drunk crowd with guards leading the way. Being drunk made the trek back to your room a lot faster. Your mother had you sit in a chair in front of the mirror as she spruced you up. She wiped away the melted make up around your face and replaced it with a fresher coat. Another coat of lipstick was applied, Betsey came waltzing in with tiny jewels to sew into your hair strands, probably to distract from the flyaways. Then your mother shooed her away. You stared at yourself in the mirror as you did hours before, you were starting to sober up.

“What if I had said no?” You questioned.

“No what?”

“To Ren’s proposal?”

“Don’t be silly, you said yes. That’s all that matters.”

“Had I not said yes though, what would have happened?”

“Don’t be silly, you would have said yes regardless.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means we know what’s good for you.” She replied coldly. 

“But I-“

“Drop it, NOW.” She raised sternly.

You felt your heart sink into your stomach, your blood drew cold.

“I don’t love him.”

“You will learn, I did with your father.”

Someone cleared their throat across the room interrupting the heated conversation. It was your father, the king. 

“I’d like a moment alone with our daughter.” He said.

“Very well.” You mother removed her hands from your shoulders and skulked out of the room with her eyes on you.

Once she left the room your father turned his attention on you. He was silent as he stood before you, you waited for him to speak. Just as you were about to say something yourself his hand struck the entire side of your head knocking you to the floor on your knees.

You were so taken aback at the pain and surprise you held your face staring at his feet.

“I will not have this whining anymore! The dramatics end here!”

All the kindness you thought this man had was gone in less than a moment. As cruel as the queen. 

“I’ve worked hard to keep this planet from its demons and debts. With the First Order backing us we’ll be untouchable, the relief and power we finally need.”

“All I am is a business deal then?” You muddled. He knelt down to your level.

“I’ll do anything to keep this planet from going into disarray.” He simply said. “You will happily and graciously marry the Supreme Leader, do you understand?”

You nodded. 

“Good.” He cupped the side of your face that he struck, then left without another word.

You sat there for some minutes trying to piece together today’s events. All you could do was stare blankly at the marble floor. Your parents didn’t care for you, you were sure they hardly loved you. This isn’t love.

“Oh there you are!” Betsey came clamoring in the room.

You looked up at her with tears in your eyes.

“Whatever is the matter?” She asked.

“Nothing.” You wiped them away, she helped you stand.

“They’re announcing your arrival in the ballroom soon, Supreme Leader Ren has been looking for you.”

You let her guide you out of the room and through the palace. Yet another part of it you had yet to see, it would take weeks to explore alone. She walked you to a grand hall where pictures of past royal couples were displayed. The pillars holding the walls were marble striped with black steel, the entire floor was solid gold. It took minutes to walk to the end where you were met with golden double doors reaching the ceiling. 

“We’ll wait here for the Supreme Leader. Your parents have already announced themselves to the ballroom.”

“I’m here.” His familiar voice came down the great hall.

It didn’t take him near as long to walk the hall as you did, his height alone made him stride. His expression was soft, but you still dreaded seeing him, not because you disliked him, but because of the awkward air between you. Then you thought about your father. Was Ren in on it with your parents? Or is he genuinely interested in having you as a wife? After the incident with your father you didn’t know who truly cared.

When he met you at the end of the hall he took you in a tight embrace, your sore cheek rested against his chest. It felt warming, and comfortable. With all your conflicting emotions you wrapped your arms around him too. He took your chin in his hand to have a look at you.

“I’ll protect you until my dying day.” He told you.

“Shall we?” Betsey added motioning to the golden doors. You both nodded.

The grand doors began to open revealing a sliver of the ballroom behind it. All eyes and heads turned towards you. You recognized all the guests from the courtyard and then some. A lot of more than some, there had to be at least five hundred people there. A majority stood around the center of the room where you assumed people used to dance. Three identically gigantic black chandeliers hung at the center of the ceiling. Hundreds of smaller ones went outward in a circle completely lighting the room, the ceiling itself was glass and between the chandeliers you could see the clear night sky. The pillars matched the ones in the hall and the golden floors too. It was no doubt beautiful.

A golden droid stood to the side of the doors.

“May I present to you Princess Astrelle of Aiphus with her fiancé Supreme Leader Kylo Ren of the First Order.” The droid announced.

Clapping ensued at your entrance, Ren took your arm in his and lead the way. As you walked through the doors you saw that the ballroom was much larger and grander. A teared stage much like a cake was off to the right side where your parents sat upon green granite thrones.

To the left were rather long black marble tables with a feast of foods only gods and royals could dream of. Everything sat on a gold platter and above them were floating vases of black and green flowers you were sure came from multiple planets and regions. White tables were scattered around where people could sit and enjoy themselves. 

Your father rose from his throne.

“I implore you all to enjoy yourselves at the behalf of our kingdom. Our lovely daughter is home again! CELEBRATE!” The King jovially spoke out to the crowd.

Everyone cheered his name like a chant. It was bewildering that they weren’t chanting the name of their home instead.

“Would you like something to eat?” Ren interrupted your concentration on the throne, maybe some real food will do.

You took a gold plate in hand and started mounding whatever looked good on it, Ren followed behind doing the same. A few others started picking things out across the way. 

“Excuse me, Supreme Leader Ren.” A shaking voice came from behind.

The same officer that came to find the General in the Maze the other day was standing before Ren sweating so badly you could put a bucket under him. He dressed formally in First Order garb.

“Yes Lieutenant?” Ren asked, his tone wasn’t pleased. He didn’t want to be bothered in his off work hours you guessed.

“We’ve got a situation.”

“Rectify it with the General. I’m trying to enjoy my time with my fiancé tonight.”

“Sir, it’s about the scavenger.” 

You could feel the unsettling silence between them. Ren then turned to you.

“I’m afraid I must tend to emergency work. I’m sorry.” He cupped your face.

You nodded “It’s alright.”

He kissed your forehead a quickly left with the dark haired Lieutenant. No one noticed, you looked to see if your parents had, but they were consumed with a group of people at the moment. This was your time to slink off into some far off corner. Part of you just wanted to crawl under the dining tables. 

You decided you’d sure as hell bring your plate along, piling more food as you walked quickly down the line. So quickly you knocked over a small tower of biscuits. They sprawled all over the table and floor, you looked around to see if anyone had watched your accident unfold.

“Always in trouble I see.” A familiar face watched you just on the other side of the table, a gargantuan cake partially blocking the red heads view. He wore the same outfit he donned in the courtyard including his hat.

“Oh, it’s you.” You replied.

“I didn’t mean to startle you.” He leaned down and set a handful of biscuits on the table, you did the same as he came around to help you clean up your mess. 

At this point you were crawling on the floor in your gown grabbing every biscuit in sight. The General knelt down with you. Every so often his hand grazed over yours trying to grab at the same biscuit you were reaching for.

“I didn’t see you at my proposal celebration.” You commented nosily, you threw up a handful of biscuits on the table.

“I had to tend to some work, an emergency.” 

“With the scavenger?”

He paused at your question.

“Sorry, I just heard Ren talking about it.” You added.

After what seemed like an eternity of biscuit picking, The General helped you to your feet.

“That gown is becoming on you.” He complimented.

“Thank you.” Your cheeks warmed.

“Would you like to dance with me Princess?” He removed his hat, resting it on his chest. You peeked over his shoulder, the floor was lively behind him. People danced around with each other, holding one another.

“Yes.” You breathed without a thought.

You linked arms with him as he walked you around the tables…towards the dance floor. Everyone was so immersed with themselves you hardly fretted about wandering eyes. Your parents drunkenly danced with each other on the stage of their thrones, they smiled at one another. Something you hadn’t seen before, who knew they had emotions. You grew angrier watching them until The General came into your focus. He stepped back a foot or so and held your hands in his.

“I don’t know how to formally dance. My mother was too frustrated with me to keep the lessons going.” You told him.

“It’s quite alright. I’ll guide you.” He let go of your right hand and pressed his hand against your lower back pushing you closer to himself.

Soft music played around the both of you but you tuned it out trying to focus on the dancing, you looked to your feet then his face. Then your feet, then his face. Those green eyes.

“See, you’ve got it.” He told you.

“What is her name?” You asked of him.

“Who?”

“The woman I remind you of.”

His dancing slowed a bit but he carried on.

“…her name was Y/N.”

You tilted your head, thinking for a moment.

“What happened?” You muttered.

“I pushed her away…too far. When I realized I had made my mistakes it was too late. She was gone and I had no one to tell but myself that I loved her.”

You looked up at him very aware of how close you’d become. You wanted to cry for him. 

He sighed lightly at you “I have to be getting on with my night, unfortunately.” He slowed the dance to a halt.

You didn’t want to let go.

“I want to see you again.” You boldly told him.

“You will.”

“When?”

He took your hand he held in his and placed a kiss atop it, he bowed graciously and left without another word as everyone continued to dance around you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter: Sweet Beliefs - Cyann & Ben
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TmvkCEnx8BE


	11. Into the Night

So many men wanted to dance with you. Out of politeness you agreed to every single dance. After a dozen or so you lost count, half the time you pretended they were someone else. With all the spinning you started to feel sick, you just really wanted to leave this ball. Too many people floated around you, tugging at your dress as they drew too close. Your parents were fully engulfed with the crowd drinking the minutes away as you stood there looking over everyone. No one was there to lord you over at the moment, this was your chance to slip away again. To lull your stomach.   
Everyone was so compact it took some time to slink around. You were growing frustrated at the bodies swaying, every person or alien that stood in your way hardly so much as looked at you. But you bore into them with full judgment, imagining how they ruled over others. Not all of them royalty, but all of them rich, you imagined they were all as cruel as your parents. An unfair judgement you thought, but you were in no mood to be optimistic.   
The relief was almost instant when you broke free into the ballroom entrance hallway. The silence was immediate, relieving. Two golden droids stood at the sides of the door standing straight backed, ready to open the doors upon anyone approaching. Every hall was empty all the way back to your bedroom, and all you could think about was the General. He said he’d see you again, but when?  
You sighed at the sight of your bedroom door, opened it and walked inside. Your room was dimly lit, the balcony doors opened to the patio and night sky, the ceiling long linen drapes blew in the ocean breeze. The way they danced made you stop abruptly, it looked as if someone was standing just on the other side. And then you spotted the red hair.  
“Armitage!” You said gleefully, skipping across your room. Running up to the balcony couldn’t come quicker.

“I didn’t expect to see you so soon General, the ball-“ You started to say as he turned.

It looked like him. But it wasn’t. Nearly identical to the General, but with a vibrant red beard.

“Mistaking me for my brother is getting a little old don’t you think?” He replied smoothly.

“Brother?” You backed away a bit. 

“You don’t remember?” He raised a brow.

“I’ve never met you.”

“You know me, remember? You shot me. Right in the leg.” He half smiled, thinking back upon a memory. 

You shook your head and in a single stride he embraced you and your face with his hands. It was too late to reel back as he kissed you deeply. You responded with an ill-intentioned slap to his face. He hardly looked surprised, only slightly amused.

“You did that last time too.” He smiled. You tried to turn away but he gripped you against himself, you struggled against his frame but his arms were like stone. Panic set in as he dragged you towards the edge of the balcony, you were ready to scream out when your stomach dropped.

He threw you off the balcony. Of course you screamed, it was short because the water logged cliffs below never came. You landed on something soft only several feet below, a padded seat of a large speeder.

A round orange and white droid beeped wildly at you, two men stared at you blankly. One had very tan skin and dark hair, wearing a simple white linen long sleeve shirt and cargo-like pants. The other man was much darker than him, he wore a leather resistance jacket. Both held blasters in their hands, they didn’t point them at you fortunately.

You looked up to see the bearded red head standing above, he jumped down to land on his feet before you much like a silent cat. 

“We need to go, Rey can’t distract him much longer.” The tan one said. 

“Who are you? Whose Rey?!” You frantically asked.

The droid beeped at you wildly.

“I know you.” You told the machine.

“You know BB-8?” The tan man asked.

“I-uh” You shook your head “I don’t KNOW him, I saw him the other night in the city. With a woman.”

“Rey.” They all said in unison.

“WHO ARE YOU?” You demanded.

“I’m Poe, this is Finn.” The tan man referred to himself and the darker skin man.

“We’re with the Resistance, here to rescue you from Ren.” He assured you with a calmer demeanor.

“My fiancé?” You replied.

“HE’S YOUR FIANCE?!” Finn half shouted.

Poe looked to the red head standing over you, exchanging a silent wave of words with each other. A look only they understood. 

“Do you know my name?” The red head asked.

“For the hundredth time, I don’t know you!” You yelled.

A murmur of voices came from your bedroom, the red head crouched down wrapping himself around you, his hand covering your mouth. He nodded at Finn and Poe, they nodded back. Poe stood and jumped to the steering column of the speeder, in that instant the speeder took off. You screamed into the hand of your captor as the vehicle darted at a sharp angle towards the bottom of the cliffs beneath the palace. He held you in place while he gripped a convenient handle at the side of the speeder. 

The speeder flattened out before hitting the water, it simply glided like a boat now over the calm night waves. You were instantly chilled, the mist hitting your skin. Now ways away from the palace in a matter of seconds the hand came away from your mouth, he gripped your wrist instead of holding you now.

“I didn’t know it had gotten this bad.” He told you softly. You wished you knew what he was talking about. Wished you knew anything.

Tears started to well in your eyes, you weren’t really scared, no, that wasn’t the feeling running through your limbs. Just confused and at the end of your rope in trying to grasp at any understanding of what was going on. 

In the distance you spotted a black mass hovering over the water, closer and closer the bigger it got until you were upon it. It was a ship, large, flat and circular with a pointed like end cut off at the tip. Beneath the ship a ramp let itself down, in the darkness of the black sea and night a figure was illuminated by the ships light. A woman stood at the ramp, three hair buns hanging from the back of her head. You had seen her before, with the little droid in the city.

Upon seeing her BB-8 beeped with glee. 

“Rey!” Finn beamed.

“Come on! We’ve got to go!” She shouted over the sounds of the ship hovering over the water, it was enough to make waves. 

She reached out a hand to help Finn up, Poe hoisted the droid onto the ramp and then climbed up himself. He then reached out to you. The red head made you stand and lifted your hips, Poe took your outstretched hand and pulled you up. You were pulled inside out of the wet night. It was an older ship with a handful of hallways leading to rooms you couldn’t see. But you were brought to a main living area, a lounge room. Poe lead you to a booth with a circular table, the others came along into the room too with the red head trailing last. His eyes were on you.

“Are you cold? Would you like a blanket?” Poe asked. You nodded quietly.

A burly mild growling sound entered the room, all you saw was a large mass of fur envelope Poe into a hug.

“Yes Chewy we missed you too.” Poe shrugged him off.

Finn and Rey were talking amongst themselves about you, Ren’s name was mentioned. Poe brought you the blanket he offered and set it around your shoulders. Tears streamed down your face, he looked like he wanted to comfort you. The red headed doppelganger approached him from behind, they exchanged another look of silent words. Poe and the furry creature called Chewy joined the others across the room. 

“What’s your name?” You asked of the General’s brother.

“Rivven.” He simply replied.


	12. My Way

“I don’t know a Rivven.” You stated.

He chuckled and sighed “You knew me.”

You shook your head “I’m sorry, I don’t remember you.”

“What about Royston? Aven? Remember them?” He asked. You remembered the General mentioning a brother named Aven earlier before.

“What do they look like?” You returned.

“Like me.”

“You’re all brothers?” You raised a brow.

“There’s a handful of us, dear Armie is the oldest. Explains his controlling behavior, doesn’t it?” He smiled. A joke you didn’t quite get, what else is new? All this was doing was furthering the confusion.

“I have questions for you.” You pressed.

“Go ahead.” He nodded.

“How do I know the General?” 

“Short version? Or long version?”

You stared at him blankly, his smirk faded, he knelt down resting an elbow on the table.

“Much to my disdain, you fell in love with him. He carelessly sent you away to live with our brother, Royston. Personally it hurt my feelings that my big brother didn’t trust me, it hurt little Aven’s feelings even more, so he took it upon himself to ruin everything. One thing led to another and now here we are.”

“You do a poor job at explaining things.” You sniffled, a bit frustrated.

“Well that was the short version but come on, you already know these things.”

“I DON’T KNOW ANYTHING!” You screamed at him.

“What’s going on here?” Rey approached. Everyone’s eyes were on you.

Rivven stood “She doesn’t remember. She just--I don’t know.”

“Telling her she knows things she clearly doesn’t remember is only making it worse. You’re not helping anyone.”

Rey shooed him away by telling him to prepare the ship for take off. He was resistant at first, but she reminded him that he’d have his time to talk with you, that you needed space to breathe and take it all in. She was rather comforting for a kidnapper. 

“I’m sorry, he can be a bit grating at times. I’m still getting used to him myself.”

You pulled the blanket tighter around your body.

“If you’re tired you’re more than welcome to lie down.” Rey told you.

“I’m not really interested in sleeping right now.” You replied.

“Understandable. You have a lot on your mind, I’m sure you have a lot of questions.”

“How do I know you?”

“To be honest, this is one of the first times we’ve met. Rivven came to us for our help in finding you. When we found out Kylo Ren was involved the Resistance insisted we go on this mission. It seems you’ve been caught in the middle of it all.”

“Why is this happening to me?” 

It was a question more for yourself.

“Look, I know this might not mean much right now, but everyone here wants to help you.” Rey added.

You glanced around the ship to see everyone scrambling about the area to leave.

“Where are we going?” You asked.

“Not far, just far enough to keep out of Kylo’s range. Until we’ve made sure you’re safe. And this ends.”

“What does he want from me?”

“We’re not entirely sure but we think he’s trying to use you to be in the King’s good graces for something in return. Be it weapons, allegiance, power, we don’t really know. What we do know is you’re not really the missing princess. Either the King knows you’re not his real daughter and he and Ren have the same goal, or the King is completely oblivious and truly believes you to be his daughter and that Ren is only seeking payment.”

With everything going on you didn’t doubt they were telling the truth. It just felt right. You knew there was no way you could actually be royalty, there were far too many unexplained situations in the past week alone that proved this.

“He wants war, and to ruin my brother’s life in the process.” Rivven said in passing by the table, he assured Rey the ship was ready to clear. 

“Rivven is convinced I can restore your memories the same way Ren took them away.”

“How?” You asked.

She gave you a grave face, as did Rivven. 

“It’ll be painful.” Rey admitted. 

Pain? Why not? You’d do anything at this point.

“I just want to remember.” You admitted to them. Whatever it takes to keep from continuously drowning. 

“We just have to get to a safer destination before we try first. Ren senses I’m near, it’s easier for me to block him with distance between us.”

You nodded in agreement, not completely understanding.

“You’re like him?” You asked.

She paused to look down at the ground, she had unwarranted shame behind her eyes.

“It’s a gift I unfortunately share with him. He uses it to oppress, I try to help people.” She told you.

Rivven assured her it was safe to leave again. She stood up from the table with a reassuring nod, leaving you with Rivven. He stared at you intently, you averted your gaze. You wanted to make a comment but decided against it.

“Are you hungry? Thirsty?” He asked.

“No.” You answered simply.

“Maybe something more comfortable to wear?” He offered.

Now that was something you agreed to. He briefly left the room and returned with a linen shirt much like Poe was wearing and cargo pants, they were a bit too big but he provided a belt at least. He showed you to a rather tight bathroom where you started to change. Rivven told you to brace yourself because the ship was taking off. You held your arms out against the walls, it was an easy task because this bathroom was so small you could barely stand. With the walls shaking and wobbling legs you tried your best to change. Finally you emerged with the dress over an arm.

“Was your party at the very least a little bit of fun?” Rivven asked leaning against the door frame. 

“Are you always like this?” You returned.

“What? Devilishly handsome?”

You rolled your eyes and made your way back to the booth. You sighed then sat down and bunched up the gown next you, you pulled up the blanket over your shoulders and laid down.

“There’s bunks on this ship if you want to lay down.” Rivven said.

“I’m ok here.” You pulled the blanket over your head and drifted off to drown out the time.

****  


* * *

Hours had passed in your stirring sleep, you tossed and turned in the booth regretting not taking Rivven’s offer of a bunk. But you somehow got some needed rest. You were ready for another round off shut eye when Rivven lightly shook you awake. You peeked your head out of your cave.

“We’re here.” 

“Where?” You asked,

“I have no idea, somewhere in the middle of nowhere.”

And he was right. It was in the middle of nowhere. You found yourself standing at the bottom of the ramp of the ship surrounded by a dense forest. You wondered how they even landed in the thick woods. Surely the ship was well hidden though. It was very early morning, the sun had just begun to rise.

“Nice shoes.” Poe made a comment passing you down the ramp with a metal crate in his arms. The furry creature called Chewy growled in response just behind him. You looked down at your feet. You still wore the heels that matched your gown, making an odd ensemble of an outfit. 

The ground was nothing but thick soft moss and grass, perhaps you could go shoeless for the sake of getting out of the heels. You ended up standing off to the side mushing your toes in the grass watching everyone unload crates, it was awkward to say the least because you didn’t know whether to offer help or not. All the crates matched, they managed to drag nearly thirty of them down the ramp. Rivven came to stand next to you as the others offloaded the last of them.

“What’s in them?” You asked.

“Weapons made for the First Order.” He replied.

“Blasters?”

“A new kind of blaster, made with supremely advanced technology.”

“What do they want with them?”

“The King calls them Void Cannons, they rip literal holes in space and matter to pull everything in.”

“Like a black hole.”

“Exactly. We took what they had intended to give away to the First Order.”

“Why?”

“Honestly, I could care less. They wanted them out of the First Order’s hands.” He nodded at the others conversing in a group looking through the crates. “The Resistance just happened to have crossed paths with you, they only agreed to help you if I could get them access to the weapons, and Rey was interested in finding Kylo Ren.”

Some silence passed between you until he spoke again “Why did you say yes?” He asked.

“Yes?” You replied a bit confused.

“Your engagement.”

“I don’t know why I said yes…it happened so fast I just couldn’t will myself to say no. Like something was blocking me. I wanted to say no, Armitage was practically standing right there, all I could think about was him.” You admitted.

“Why didn’t you say so before?!”

“I don’t even know what’s going on!” You practically yelled at him, everyone looked your direction. Rey came lightly jogging over.

“You really know how to rile her up.” Rey guided him away from you and up the ramp. You soon started to hear whispers from inside the ship, most likely right around the corner. You shifted closer to hear.

“You need to calm down.” Rey urged Rivven.

“I’m trying, she’s just so…lost.”

“I know that, we all know that. But upsetting her is not going to help her. Ren has stolen almost everything about her and molded her like new. He makes every decision for her and makes her forget it immediately after. I’ve seen it in his head, I saw it last night before you picked her up.”

Rivven let out a long sigh.

“Before you try to restore her memories, just let me talk to her. I think I can-“

Rey cut him off “You’re stressing her out, talking at her won’t bring it back.”

“JUST…let me…I can’t bear to see her in pain like that again. You weren’t there when he did it.”

“Fine. But we don’t have any more time to waste, if I feel like your way isn’t working, we do it my way.” Rey replied.

“Okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter 
> 
> Cold - Aqualung & Lucy Schwartz


	13. Last Resort

“I’m going to start with the day we met.”

“Okay.” You gave a hopeful sigh and a nod.

“I’d go with something a little more in tune to your memories with my brother, but as I wasn’t there I’m not going to be much good at trying to jog your memory in that sense.”

“It might be best to try anyway, since she is…was closer with him.” Rey added. Rivven gave her a half glare, she pursed her lips and took that as a cue to leave.

“Now, the day we first met, or I should say evening. You were travelling with a co-worker, a man I believe you called Coy. Dark hair, goatee if I remember correctly. You were just outside Centrisle, a city on Arkanis. You were camping in the night up in the trees, when my troop was traveling that night. We mistakenly tried to rob the both of you.”

You raised a brow.

“I know how it sounds!” He defended “But you arguably defended yourself rather well, you shot me in my leg with my brothers blaster when I took it upon myself to kidnap you.”

“So this isn’t the only time you’ve tried to kidnap me?”

“Well...it was just too good of an opportunity to pass up at the time. In my very little interaction with you that night I knew right away that you were rather close to Armitage, I thought I could really grind his nerves if I happened to let’s say kidnap you and hold you for ransom.” 

“How did you know?” 

“Well for starters you had a personal monogrammed blaster on you, a blaster I gave him a very long time ago when we were teenagers. You also knew him by name, something very few people actually know.”

“And then?” You asked.

“I woke up tied to a tree thirty some feet in the air. Not too long after I got a very angry call from my brother. He was none too pleased with my actions, implied a minor threat on my life, something he’s never done before so I must have really pissed him off.”

Out of curiosity you asked what the General had said specifically.

“Something along the lines of “You’ve always crossed lines with me Rivven, but this was a line that you shouldn’t have even approached the vicinity of. If I come to find you’ve so much as caused permanent damage or continue to wreak childish mayhem against her I will snuff out what little is left of the pathetic life you choose to live.”” Rivven mocked his brothers words in an overly posh accent.

You sat there trying to soak in as much as you could, but nothing seemed familiar still.

“Had he not threatened me I might have let Royston do away with you when you came to him.”

“And Royston is…” You tried to find words.

“The youngest. First Armie, then me, then Aven, and finally Royston.” 

“Armitage said you had different fathers?” 

“Yes, after Armitage was born our mother wanted to raise him as a normal proper little boy. His father had other intentions, she tried to remain amicable but he basically had full custody over Armitage. She later met my father and had me along with Aven and Royston.”

“And how did I meet Armitage?” You asked.

“I asked you that but you hardly told me anything about him when you were with my brothers and I. All you told me was that he saved you. No other details.”

You sighed “This isn’t going to work.” You stood up. Pain or not, you wanted to know everything. NOW.

“Wait.” Rivven grasped your hand. You wanted to yank it away, but you waited for him to say something.

“I’ll tell you why he sent you away. So far away.”

“Tell me.”

“Ren was intent on killing you…because…well-“

“WHY?!”

“You were pregnant.”

You tilted your head.

“Armitage sent you away to protect you. He knew Ren wouldn’t be against killing you, he knew it gave Ren even more of a reason to kill you. So he hid you.”

You had to sit back down again, Rivven still grasped your hand.

“Is the baby his?” You quickly asked.

“Yes. They’re his.”

“They’re?”

“Twins.”  
A long silence passed. You tried. Tried. Tried to remember. 

“I-I wan’t” You trembled over your words “I want to talk to Rey now.”

Rivven looked defeated, but wavered in your request. He left you sitting to yourself as he walked off to find her. You meshed your hands in your hair ready to tear it out by the strands. Some minutes later he returned with Rey and the entire group in tow, including the round little droid.

“I’m sorry dear but you’ll be having an audience.” Rivven said.

“We’ll need them to restrain you.” Rey urged you up from sitting. 

“Restrain?” You asked.

“The pain will be intense. I’ve asked them to hold you down.”

Chewy groaned, the others looked with worry in their eyes. BB-8 beeped some, you couldn’t understand him. He was a droid after all, his language was something you didn’t know but you assumed it was sorrow or pity based on his tone of tunes. You walked with them to an open patch of lengthy grass and laid you down. They propped your head up with a pillow. Chewy and Finn knelt at your feet and grabbed hold of your ankles. Chewys rather hairy arms tickled your skin. Rivven knelt to your right and grabbed hold of your wrist, Poe held your left. 

Rey sat at your head looking down at you, she closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. She opened them to look at you again.

“Here.” She lifted your head and pillow into her crossed lap. It actually became more comfortable that way.

“Are we all ready?” She asked around, everyone nodded.

You looked to Rivven.

“It’ll be ok.” He assured you.

“And you?” Rey asked of you.

“Yes.”

She spread her fingers over your face then pressed them to the sides of your head and temples. She bore into your eyes with hers. And the moment she closed hers, the pain followed.

There was no comfort in looking at anyone, because all you could see was a blank white scene.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song for this chapter
> 
> Diagnosis - Alanis Morrisette   
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PAX0rFrkJMA&list=PLCVKiydn9rDogumOS73h24FET-T5Q5CZB&index=60


End file.
